A Man Named Dana

Three years ago today my world changed forever.

I lost the best friend I've ever or will ever have in my life: Theodore Maynard Larson.

I don't think I've been able to deal with the sense of grief or loss in my life after his passing. Maybe I never will. I can't forget him. I am not the same person without him. My world was a better place when he was in it. Of this there is no doubt. My life is a lot more empty these days since his death.

Ted was the most frustrating friend I've ever had, yet he was also the most generous too. I am sad because of his passing but I am glad that I had the chance to be his friend for so many years. Because of him I know most of you as a friend today for if I hadn't met Ted in film class twenty years ago I most likely would have finished my computer degree and moved away to find some dead-end job in the world of business computing. Instead, I stopped and listened to my heart, which brought me to where I am today.

I can never thank Ted enough for all that he did for me. I'm sure I didn't thank him enough when he was alive. I'm also sure that I was probably the biggest pain in his life too. Good friends are that way sometimes. What was it Ted always said? "A friend is someone who knows you and likes you anyway."

As clever as I can be with words at times I just have not been able to find the right words to express my emotions over Ted's death. I try and try but nothing really makes any sense. Nothing I write does justice to the memory of the man.

I went out to Ted's grave today, as I always do on this date, with a dozen roses to place on his marker. It was really still up at the cemetary, no wind, no birds, not a sound of any kind. I brushed the snow back from the stone to place the roses. The fresh-cut flowers looked nice there but yet out of place because of the snow. I promise here and now that as I long as I am alive I will always place a dozen red roses on his grave on November 29th.

I know I'm rambling. But that's how it is when I talk about Ted. I can't find just one single kernel that summarizes his life and our friendship.

But I think somewhere in this vast cosmos Ted is watching and hoping that someday I'll get it right--not for his sake, but for mine alone.

So, Ted, wherever your spirit rests, I want to offer you thanks and remembrance for your life and our friendship. You were and will always remain my best friend.

Theodore Maynard Larson: July 5, 1940 to November 29, 2000. Rest in peace dear friend.

It's Thanksgiving here in America, a national holiday of importance second only to Christmas.

Time once again to pause for a moment and count our blessings.

I'm pretty good at whining about the crap in my life so I'm going to take a break for one day to say nothing but positive things:

I have a number of friends and family who like/love/tolerate me for reasons I cannot fully comprehend. For that unrequited affection I am truly thankful.

Beyond that I'm drawing a blank.

Wherever you are in the world, thanks for hanging in there with my blog. I count you as a friend. You are reason enough for me to keep plugging away day after day.

Thank you.

Once again it's the holiday film season. Time to roll out those big-budget Hollywood productions in order to make a lot of money. Eager, unsuspecting audiences willingly shell out millions of dollars to be entertained by these commercial ventures. Most of the time they go away with a song in their heart and a few life lessons in their head. But sometimes Hollywood dumps an ill-conceived piece of trash on audiences without a second thought.

Mega-producer Brian Grazer's latest offering, Dr. Seuss's The Cat in the Hat, is just such an example of a good idea gone south. Under-written and over-produced, this film has none of the clever charm of the original story.

The primary problem with this mess, surprisingly, is a lack of imagination. The source material is pretty thin to begin with anyway, but to stretch everything out to theatrical length the screenwriters drape a dopey one-dimensional frame involving a neurotic boss and a gold-digging boyfriend on the film. Wow! This is strictly Screenwriting 101, folks. It's hard to believe that they paid three professional writers a lot of money to turn out this pile of half-baked cliches--beginning screenwriters produce this crap by the buckets in seminars across the country every day! This kind of film needs a lot more originality and ingenuity in order to keep audiences entertained.

Take away the special effects and you have Mike Myers in a lot of makeup doing routines from SNL and Austin Powers. That hardly justifies the price of a ticket. Take my advice and avoid this movie. Unless, of course, you live here in Fargo. In that case I urge you to see it one hundred million times! Why? Because I work at the theatre that isn't showing it. I need an easy weekend at work. Ha.

Seriously, don't take my word for it. You can read the reviews for yourself at rottentomatoes.com.

Beautiful.

Have you had a chance to check out the "new" Beatles album: Let It Be... Naked, yet?

It's a stripped down version of the original 1970 release. In my opinion the new version is even better without all the studio embellishments first heard on the old version. Pick it up. Enjoy it. Love it.

"And when the night is cloudy there is still a light that shines on me..."

Let it be.

Uhhhh... sickness. Lovely. Whatever the latest cold virus going around is, I've got it. I can't sleep, I can't breathe, my throat feels like a burning river of fire, and I don't really want to do anything.

I have no witty comments about anything nor do I have any complaints either.

Perhaps when I'm better I'll be back with renewed vigor and clever words for your entertainment.

Ciao!

Okay, sorry for not updating the blog for a few days. It's been a busy weekend here for DTM. Twenty four hours at the theater without a break will do that to a person.

I don't have much to say right now. I'm too tired to be clever and too stupid to care. Is there anything in this blog that you don't already know? Maybe I'm just a bit conceited thinking that anything I could say would really be of any value.

What is there that I could possibly say that you don't already know?

I know I'm not that interesting. I'm just one of 6.6 billion people who is doing his thing--whatever the hell that thing is. And so are you. You are trying to do your thing -- trying to find your place in the universe. What kind of asshole am I who thinks I have any thing important to say about your life?

I'm just trying to cope and offer some lessons in what NOT to do. Maybe I can be an example so you can all have a better life. If I do something stupid I'm going to tell you about it right here. Your job is to read about it and NOT repeat the same mistake(s) in your life.

If I can help just one person from making one stupid mistake then I guess my pitiful life is worth something after all. Hey, that's not depression, just reality. I am small and insignificant and the sooner I accept that then the better we'll all be from now on.

I exist only to pay taxes and consume precious natural resources. Any other justification is simple delusion. I didn't ask to be here and I certainly don't deserve to be here. But I am. I have no excuse that absolves my stupidity or lethargy. But that doesn't mean that I have any more responsibility than you do in this world.

I think therefore I am.

As busy as it was at the theatre this past weekend I still managed to catch The Matrix: Revolutions and Elf at fairly quiet times. Both shows had really big weekend box office grosses. I'm not a fan of sold-out shows anymore. Too many people talk, play with their cell phones, or drape their feet over my shoulders. Why can't people behave?

Anyway, I thought The Matrix: Revolutions was a 6.5 on a scale of 1 to 10. That's a lot better than some critics thought of the film. In my humble opinion, the picture promised more than it could deliver. Sure, the effects and the fight scenes were well done but we've seen them countless times since the original film debuted five years ago.

Elf, on the other hand was endearing and fun. Sure, it was really predictable, but Will Ferrell really kept it interesting everytime he was on the screen. Understated performances from all the leads (except for James Caan) drove this film to big box-office grosses. I'd easily give it an 8.0 on a scale of 1 to 10.

This week Master and Commander and the latest Looney Tunes movie arrive in local theatres. I'm not expecting much from either film.

But who knows? Anything could happen in the crazy world of Hollywood cinema.

I've purchased a new email address: danatheman@mac.com

Please start using this if you want to contact me. I'm tired of the spam crap I'm getting with freebie accounts on yahoo.com. Sure, I could just stop subscribing to all those porn websites, but what fun would that be?

You can always post things here, but sometimes you wanna keep it all private.

At least I hope so.

I know I complain a lot on this site. I complain about a lot of things all the time in all phases of my life. Am I a complainer? Sure. Who can honestly say that they don't complain? I don't think I do it too much--I do try and balance my complaints with a lot of patience and understanding. At least I think I try to balance the bad with the good.

But you are reading my thoughts here--good and bad--so excuse me if there are complaints more often than praises. I try not to pull any punches with all of this. You hear about the cream and the crap in my life with very little editing. I write this stuff off the top of my head without too much self-editing. Why? I'm not sure really. Being me isn't very interesting or exciting so there's little reason to embellish or dismiss my adventures. It is what it is.

If I'm having a bad day I'm going to tell you about it. If you choose not to share that experience then you can point your browser to any one of a million other websites and I won't be offended. I can't force you to read this stuff if you don't want to. Right? If you don't like what I have to say then you can tell me via the feedback process. Otherwise, just go along for the ride and you may just enjoy my misery. Schadenfreude.

My purpose is to inform and entertain, and not necessarily in that order. If you are a regular reader then I thank you. I'm here for you.

It has been a long, long day. I've put a 13 hour day in at the theatre. Lots of concession sales and screaming kids. I love Saturday afternoons at the multiplex almost as much as I love Sunday afternoons. Luckily, I get to enjoy both days this weekend.

Yum.

Wells Fargo Bank thinks I'm a terrorist, at least, according to the definitions written somewhere in the Patriot Act of 2001.

That sounds pretty dramatic I know, but let me explain a little first and you can decide for yourself if I'm overreacting or not.

I was paying my usual assortment of bills to all my wonderful creditors this morning. As I came to my Wells Fargo account I noticed that my available line of credit had been reduced to zero. Yep, I go from having a $5,000 line of credit one month to having none the next. Curious, I phoned the credit center and after a bit of a runaround I found out that because I had not used my account in almost two years it was being closed since I was "obviously not a customer at this bank with a valid account." Hmmm, me thought--that's strange because I've paid my balance due on time every month without any prior problems.

But as the helpful customer-care clerk pointed out, it was not a vengeful judgement on the banks' part. Oh, no! They were just following some provision in the aforementioned Patriot Act. Apparently terrorists can funnel money to and from any Joe Q. Public's credit accounts at will and in order to stop such vile money laundering the unused accounts of American citizens can be closed without further consideration.

Wow! Welcome to the United States of Nazi.

Hey, I'm all for Homeland Security in all of its Constitution-usurping glory, but why in the world are we closing credit lines for non-terrorist consumers? Is there some logic I'm missing here that would explain the reasoning behind this move? If so, would someone please tell me so I can move on with my life?

I have yet to read the entire Patriot Act but I am intrigued by the following quote from the very top of the page: "To deter and punish terrorist acts in the United States and around the world, to enhance law enforcement investigatory tools, and for other purposes."

Hmmm, what are "other purposes" anyway? Sounds just a tad bit vague to me.

For the record I just want to state that I am a God-fearing, Constitution-loving, civic-minded American who detests terrorism in all its forms worldwide. My only arguable fault could be my liberalism but that's not enough of an excuse to deny me the right to purchase pre-made, white-trash furniture on credit! Terrorists are cowards who are intent on destroying the democratic process through psychological intimidation and physical threats. That's awful and nothing to joke about. But, for Pete's sake, what the HELL is going on in America that warrants this kind of Vaderistic invasion into the lives of everyday Americans?

How many terrorists, exactly, has the newly ordained Department of Homeland Security detained anyway? Are they any closer to thwarting the evil-doers now than they were ten years ago? Do these kind of Draconian measures really stop terrorists anyway?

I still fail to see how terrorists could bring down this country by tapping into my credit account at Slumberland.

Maybe the terrorists intend to smother us with big, fluffy pillows and leather ottomans?

Or worse yet: the Comfy Chair!!!

Yep, that's right... our first snow event is going on right now. We had snow last Friday night, but that stuff melted as soon as it hit the warm ground. Today's snow is sticking to the ground, making it tough to walk and drive out there.

The prediction is for between 3-7 inches (7 to 18 cm) of the sticky white stuff before midnight tonight. Yippee! My toes already ache from being clinched while driving and walking so far today. I can't imagine how bad they're going to feel tomorrow.

I want to give a special shout-out to my friend D-Dog as he begins his new life in the blogosphere. Welcome, old friend, to the community of bloggers. I look forward to seeing many interesting and well-written musings on life in sunny SoCal.

If anyone else wants to begin their blog adventure all you have to do is click on the permanent link section on the left side of my site. It's simple and a lot of fun too!


I'm looking forward to the release of Matrix: Revolutions tomorrow. I don't really buy into all the pop psychology b.s. the wacky Wachowski Brothers have put into their triology, i.e., the Architect scene from the last film. I'm interested in the fate of humanity as Neo and his pals battle the evil computer programs, especially the renegade Agent Smith.

Because of my work schedule though I won't get a chance to see it until Thursday. Worse yet, I'll have to pony up my $7 just like everyone else for a ticket. Warner Bros. has a strict no employee pass policy on this film. Theatre employees are not allowed to use their free pass for two weeks on this movie. Fair? No! Stupid? Yes!


Well, I gotta run. Time to make snow angels in my front yard. See ya!

November. Blah. I really, really, really do NOT have anything nice to say about this month.

First, the weather turns to winter with snow, freezing rain, and cold temperatures.

We've also just returned to standard time, which brings the night on an hour earlier. (When you work mostly at night you rarely see much of the morning anyway.)

Most significantly, November has been home to the deaths of many family members and several close friends. My maternal grandfather always said that if "you make it out of November alive, you've got another year ahead of you." There just seems to be a curse on this month for me.

Sure, it's all attitude, but sometimes that's all that matters.

On a more positive note, I'm really enjoying my new position at West Acres Cinema. Yeah, it's not rocket science, but it suits me. I enjoy the whole process of making movies happen for the masses. When you do it right you can have a hell of a good time. The frustrations really don't last long when you're elbow-deep in popcorn and butter-flavored topping oil. Yum.

Take care, y'all.